


Holminster Switch...revisited

by FreyaLionheart



Series: For those we may yet save [1]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, F/M, Final Fantasy XIV: Shadowbringers Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:08:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25285864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FreyaLionheart/pseuds/FreyaLionheart
Summary: Reika can't sleep, so she decides to go back to where it started.
Relationships: Warrior of Light/Thancred Waters
Series: For those we may yet save [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1831867
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	Holminster Switch...revisited

**Author's Note:**

> I have not written anything in years. I just had this in my head and I needed to get it out

_‘Remember us. Remember that we once lived…’_

His words echoed in her mind even as she tried to sleep. Emet-Selch...no...Hades, had caused her to think about her actions again. Even after his defeat, she still wondered about the motives of the Ascians. She recalled him mentioning that the hero of one world was the villain of another and she knew that deep down, he was right.

Reika exhaled and turned over in her bed, attempting to fall back asleep. The cries of people being turned into sin eaters, her hands shaking in fear, the eyes looking to her to be the savior. She hated it. She hated that she had to always be strong. It hurt. There was nowhere for her to turn, except for there.

She finally rolled out of her bed and sat on the edge for a moment before standing. The linen cotton of her pajamas allowed her to stay cool in the heat, but her recent terrors cause a similar feeling of overheating. She dressed light and grabbed her lance from the wall before sneaking out of her room through the window. With no striking dummies in the Crystarium, she decided to make her way there. Where it all began.

Her heart pounded as she grew closer to her destination, the blood in her veins pumping with her senses on high alert. She was scared. She was as scared as she was the first time she came here with the Crystal Exarch, Lyna and Alphinaud. Her lance trembled in her hand and she gripped it tightly, entering into the ruins of Holminster Switch. She could still hear the cries of the villagers as they tried to escape the sin eaters and their Lightwarden Philia.

She passed by the Wound and her heart lurched in her chest at the feeling. She felt the bile rise in her throat at the lingering smell her dragoon senses picked up and kept forward. She had to keep going. She needed to. As she approached the Auction, she fell to her knees and the tears fell. She remembered Tesleen and sobs wracked her body at the kind woman who sacrificed herself to save a young Au’ra. She couldn’t save her. It should have been her. Not Tesleen. Her body twisted with the pain she felt and she felt the blood of the dragon surfacing. A pained roar escaped her and she sobbed into the night sky. It hurt. It hurt so much.

‘I couldn’t save them. What kind of hero am I? I can’t even save the people I love…’

Her thoughts drifted to Moenbryda and she felt the dragon in her raging. All she did was lose people. Always too late. What good was she if she couldn’t save the people she cared about? Even Ardbert and his comrades. Their loss pained her dearly. Her final stand with Ardbert against Hades broke her into irreparable pieces. She couldn’t place it. The time they spent together in his aether induced form made her see him in a new light. Sure, he was the villain of her world, but to the First? He was a fucking hero.

Rei forced herself up with her lance and pressed forward. She knew what was at the end. She remembered the sin eaters killing the villagers. She watched those villagers turn into lesser eaters before her very eyes. It horrified her. She had her lance ready, but they took them right before her eyes. She was too late to save them. She always felt too late. Always last. Always…

_‘What kind of hero are you?’_

_‘Tell me, for whom do you fight?’_

_‘Who cares for you when you care for everyone else?’_

As she approached the Manor House Courtyard, the rage bubbled over and she felt it. From blue to red, her rage echoed and she roared in frustration. This wasn’t over. Not by a long shot. She would not fail to protect them. Not them. She could fail at anything else, but not them. She growled at the sound of footsteps behind her and whirled around with her lance pointed at her attacker.

“Woah, Rei!” The hands went up defensively and he glanced at her with worry in his hazel eyes.”It’s just me.”

“Thancred?” She asked, voice hoarse from screaming and sobbing. “Thank...thank the twelve...:”

Before he knew what was happening, she had fallen into his arms with tear stained cheeks and her ears were flat against the top of her head.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this short little snippet!
> 
> The people [here](https://discord.gg/aB66jau) enable the absolute hell out of me and it makes me feel all warm


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